Being a parent is rough - especially when you have a very inquisitive 4 year old. We have always been pretty candid and straight forward with Anna on a number of things like the names of the private parts or where babies come from (no storks at our house!). Of course though we try to simplify things to get down to her level of understanding.
In the past year Anna has gone to Sunday School, Vacation Bible School, we do a nightly devotional with her before bed and talk about God and Jesus daily. Again, we are simplifying things to help her understand things that to be honest, Chad and I don't always fully grasp!
We must be doing something right as she is often asking us questions about God or reaffirming the things that God would have on his "list" of dos and don'ts. We even hear of some proselytizing going on at daycare like when one of the kids said that he was the strongest and Anna corrected him to say, "No. God is the strongest!"
We often can answer her questions but this has gotten harder and harder! This past March we had to put our cat to sleep. We explained it all to her and in the end said that Tigger went to heaven. (Do animals go to heaven?) That was comforting to her but she is still, 5 months later, having a hard time with how he actually got there. So our over simplifying has brought on more good questions. Who brought him there? Did the vet? How did his body get way up there? Ok, so his body stayed here but his spirit went? Well, how did his spirit get there? Did he get a new body? Etc.... We answer them the best we can and sometimes we even just say we don't know! Oh, we always want to have the answers though.
Then this morning, I got a question I really didn't know how to answer in the right way for a 4 year old. It stems from the over simplifying talk that Goad is always with us! Here is the conversation:
Anna: Mommy, God is always with us right?
Me: Yep, that is right. He can be everywhere and is always with us.
Anna: How does he see all of us, with like a big TV screen and we look like real people?
Me: I don't think that is the way it is. He is so powerful that he is able to be with everyone always.
Anna: So, we can pray to God always. If we are in trouble or need to talk to him we can just pray.
Me: Yep, you can always pray to God. And when you have questions or are sad is a good time to pray.
Anna: So, if we are in trouble like we are in water and we can't swim or breathe we can pray and God will come and save us.
Me: *Gasp* Ummmmm, welllll, that is not exactly how it works. Ummm!!!! We can pray to God for help but other people would have to help you too.
Anna: Ohhhhh, you mean like lifeguards. Mom, what is Mary going to have for breakfast today?
I was saved by the short attention span of a pre-schooler! I know that conversation isn't over as she has a tendency to bring things like that up over and over again. So, now I am racking my brain for the best way to answer that question. That question of why some people are "saved" from situations like that and some aren't! Ugh! Any suggestions?
I am sure we will have an answer that will appease her but then we will move onto the next hard question that we won't know how to answer. Things you don't think about when you have a baby that is suddenly all grown up with grown up questions.
DRAG PATH
4 weeks ago
4 comments:
Hmmm... That is a tough one...
Perhaps you could start out with the story about the man who was lost at sea and prayed for God to save him? Ya know, he prayed for God and then three different things came along that would have saved his life (a raft, a boat with people, and something else), but all three times he said "no" to the help, saying that God would save him... Then, when he died, he went up to Heaven and asked why God didn't save him, and God replied -- "I did. I sent you the raft, the boat, and the [something else I can't remember]."
This would get you the first step of telling Anna that sometimes God answers our prayers in more indirect ways. As far as prayers to God that are not answered, you could always resort to Garth Brooks...
And maybe you'd just need to add that the guy in the story should have also started swimming towards the shore to help save himself? Noting that even though God is all-powerful, we shouldn't test that power, and God would want us to act for ourselves and use our own powers (e.g., swimming to the side).
Sorry, not totally helpful...
Isn't the curiosity of a young girl simply remarkable? One of the things I like to do when I talk with kids is be honest. There are some things that we cannot understand or fully know, so I tell them that. I highly doubt that this thought will satisfy Anna. So, I direct you to the things we do know. There ARE some key things about God that we can KNOW FOR CERTAIN:
1) God cannot lie. The Bible is FULL of promises that God is with us, will protect us, and calls us to Fear Not even when we don't understand.
2) God and His Son Jesus Christ love each of us SO much. There is NOTHING NOTHING NOTHING that can separate us from the love we receive from God and His Son, Jesus.
3) God made Anna special. There is nobody else like her, now or ever will be. And He loves her perfectly.
4) Jesus Christ came to this earth to be God in flesh, to take on all of our sins, and bore them @ the Cross. Death licked His earthly life. But Death did not win, Jesus was too powerful - Jesus came to life again! And when He ascended into Heaven (a miracle that I don't fully understand) He told us that He would save a place for us in eternity. We get to choose to be the recipient of this grace. Anna can too!
5) Coming to church (I won't be too bias, my sister) - to A church that meets Anna's curiosity for a faith life - will give Anna and you/Chad a common denominator of conversation where curiosity happens. More answers you won't know may occur, but more enlightenment you may gain.
Those are just some of the things we can know.
Can I say, before I overstay my welcome, that I am very glad that you are WILLING to converse with your daughter about God. So many parents ignore their questions, or the journey of life that happens before their eyes.
Yeah for the Carstens!
Joe and I had a conversation about this the other night. The phrase "God helps those who help themselves" came to mind (even though it's a phrase I'm not real fond of). David's story brings that phrase to life.
Additionally, your question about animals going to heaven was discussed too. Joe's answer was that as Christian's, we don't believe pets/animals go to heaven...they have no soul. The presence of a soul is what separates humans from animals. Animals are here to serve us (food among other things). Humans don't eat each other, though throw in communion/eucharist and the wine is the blood and bread is the body and pretty soon we're cannibals. So if we consume Christ, how can we not be animals and therefore, we'll see Tigger in Heaven.
Okay, so sometimes our conversations get weird.
I love my friends and family! Just when I need the support and advice you are there for me! Thanks for comments. Sometimes it really does take a village! ha!
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